


The Way They Make Me Feel

by thisnthat



Series: I Trust God Will Understand [2]
Category: Yentl (1983)
Genre: Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-23
Updated: 2018-07-23
Packaged: 2019-06-15 03:22:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,420
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15403851
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thisnthat/pseuds/thisnthat
Summary: Anshel and Avigdor return to Hadass and share their plan for the future as one family.





	The Way They Make Me Feel

The smell of almond cookies wafts through the Vishkower house as Hadass rushes about the kitchen. A full meal lies in wait for the return of her husband, Anshel, and Avigdor. With Mr. and Mrs. Vishkower out of town as well, the last two days have been rather lonely for Hadass with only her servant as company. She took the opportunity to continue her studies with less interruption. 

“How proud Anshel will be,” she thinks to herself

She accidently breaks one of the cookies as she catches herself daydreaming about Anshel.

“HaShem wouldn’t want this to go to waste,” Hadass chuckles to herself as she eats the broken cookie.

An approaching wagon and chuffing horse outside draws Hadass to the window. Anshel holds the reigns with such confidence, until his eyes meet Hadass’ and he immediately blushes, waving rapidly at her. She laughs, returning his wave shyly. She steps outside to welcome her boys home and is met by huge smiles and loud hello’s. The two men quickly grab their luggage before the servant pulls the carriage away.

“Hadass!” Anshel rushes toward her in excitement, wrapping her in his arms.

“I thought I was supposed to miss you more?” Hadass chuckles.

Anshel blushes before turning to reach a hand out toward Avigdor.

“I invited Avigdor for dinner again, I hope that’s okay?” Anshel asks.

“Of course, you are the man of the house,” she responds, eyeing Anshel with a keen smile.

“Great! We have so much to tell you!” Avigdor exclaims.

He quickly heads into the house with a majority of the luggage balanced in his arms. Hadass shoots Anshel an inquisitive look, but he just sighs and shakes his head at Avigdor’s enthusiasm. 

~

The three of them sit in the parlor after dinner as Anshel and Avigdor devour the many sweets Hadass had laid out for them with their coffee. She puts her embroidery to the side next to the handful of books Anshel brought back for her, crossing her arms to look at them with a face mixed between a scold and a smile. They had discussed their whole trip in detail, but Hadass knew when her boys were keeping secrets.

“There’s more to tell, isn’t there?” she asks.

Anshel swallows his bite of cookie quickly, trying to beat Avigdor to the first word for once. Avigdor sits back and crosses his hands behind his head, watching Anshel struggle.

“Hadass, you and I should talk,” Anshel says, already reaching for her hand.

“That serious?” she asks.

“It’s all good news, I promise,” he reassures.

Anshel nervously holds to Hadass’ hand, leading her to their bedroom for a private discussion.

~

Anshel finishes explaining his journey since his father’s death and begins to unbutton his shirt when Hadass interrupts him with a hug. She pulls him in tight, crying into his shoulder.

“You’re not upset?” he asks, blinking back tears.

“Of course not, my love,” she pulls away to look into his eyes, “it all makes sense now, why you’ve been acting so strange.”

Anshel blushes, relieved by her response. He quickly stops himself; sitting up for the part he dreaded the most.

“You know this means we can’t have children together,” he says.

Hadass bites her lip, looking away. It had taken months for her to let go of her first love, Avigdor. Once she did she fell head over heals for Anshel. He notices everything. Not a single kind or thoughtful gesture of hers goes unthanked, and are always returned in equally adorable ways. She has never felt this way toward anyone before, but something in her aches for Avigdor’s longing gaze and boisterous laugh. She still loves Avigdor, just differently. Maybe? An idea flashes in her eyes before she jumps out of bed.

“That’s why you brought Avigdor,” she says.

Anshel smiles, running to the door and calling down for Avigdor. Avigdor rushes up the stairs, skipping steps before tumbling into the room. Hadass covers her mouth as she laughs at his boyish behavior. 

“We’re finally going to get married,” Avigdor says, lifting Hadass into the air.

“How will we ever be able to convince my family?” She asks before Avigdor interrupts her with a kiss.

“We’ll tell them I went to see a doctor on our trip and found I can’t give you children,” Anshel shrugs.

“There’s nothing you want more than children, and they want grandchildren, it’s perfect,” Avigdor adds.

Hadass pulls away from Avigdor, reaching for Anshel’s hands. They look deep into each other’s eyes as she furrows her brow.

“But, I promised Anshel before HaShem that I would love him for the rest of my days,” she says.

“No one says we have to stop loving each other. And besides, I’m not going anywhere,” Anshel responds.

“In fact, we’re all going somewhere,” Avigdor winks.

“What?” Hadass gasps.

“We found a place closer to the yeshiva that, with your parents blessing and Avigdor and me working, we could very well afford,” Anshel reassures her.

Hadass holds onto Anshel’s hand and reaches for Avigdor’s with the other. She clings onto them for dear life, trying to grasp the meaning of their words. 

“Is there a way to be with both of these men whom I love so dearly? What about my poor parents? Can I really leave them already?” She wonders.

“We know, it’s a lot at once,” Anshel says.

“But the three of us will find a way,” Avigdor says, a smile growing steadily across his face.

The three of them embrace, albeit awkwardly for their first attempt, and burst into joyous laughs.

“Wait, what about your studies?” Hadass asks.

“I think the yeshiva could do without the two of us causing trouble everyday,” Anshel laughs. Avigdor ruffles Anshel’s hair playfully.

“This just all feels so sudden,” she continues, shaking her head.

Avigdor runs his thumb along the top of her hand, “We’ve all worked hard for this day to come. We’ve earned it.”

The three of them lay across the bed, backs resting on the headboard. Hadass sits in the middle, hands entwined with both Anshel and Avigdor’s hands. Hadass can hardly believe the reality of their situation. The shock of Anshel’s truth explaining all her fears and confirming all that she loved. Her continued studying of the Talmud and other sacred texts that had always been forbidden to her. The return of her sweet Avigdor, just as in love with her as with her Anshel. Their Anshel.

~

With their marriage annulled and a new one between Hadass and Avigdor, no one could suspect Anshel moved with them for any reason other than to be with his friends and continue his studies. From time to time the secrecy of the whole arrangement eats at them, but the love all three have for each other outweighs any need to involve outsiders in the knowledge of their arrangement. 

“Anshel’s” room functions more as a study for Hadass to read in during her spare time and for the three of them to argue in all night. Though they never go to bed angry, of course. Each night they pile into the master bed together, tangled in each other’s arms. All are exhausted from long days of work and study in town for the boys and, well, also work and study for Hadass in their home. Money is much tighter now that Hadass is no longer under her parents’ wings, but she tirelessly works to make their small apartment a home. 

This morning begins as any other for the three lovers. Avigdor prepares a breakfast for the three of them. He insisted on learning since Anshel swears he would end up burning the house down and Hadass needs a break every once in a while. Today will be full of activity for each of them as Anshel and Avigdor prepare for the end of their term and Hadass will be visiting her parents. Before the boys can rush out the door Hadass calls out to them.

“You forgot your goodbyes,” she laughs.

“Of course,” Avigdor smiles.

The two of them wait patiently by the door. Hadass walks toward them holding their newborn daughter, cooing at her gently.

“See you tonight my lovely ladies,” Avigdor winks.

“Have a great time at your grandparents’,” Anshel whispers before kissing them both.

Hadass watches, as her two loves head out toward the yeshiva, arguing already. She shakes her head and laughs, returning to the master bedroom to finish getting her and her baby ready for the long day ahead of them.


End file.
